Josh, Lindsay, and Mackenzie

In order to convey an accurate account of All Hallow's Eve, the following transmission will be told in the third person...

As we all know, last night was Halloween. The Rakers had no Halloween plans other than to spend time working on their crafting endeavors and hand out candy. Lindsay was in charge of the kids and Josh was in charge of keeping the dog penned up in the kitchen with a nice, meaty bone. The night began later than expected, with the first trick-or-treater arriving somewhere around 7. In the beginning, the costumes were fun, cute, and everyone was exceptionally polite. As the evening wore on, that trend faded for a more recent trend with kids not in costume and not saying thank you. It was at this point that Lindsay decided to create a list of requirements for next year when people come to her door. These requirements are (in no particular order):

1. Costume required. End of story. If you are wearing plain clothes, that appear to be yours, you get no candy from the Rakers. Lindsay doesn't care if you are going as a "high schooler" or a "bum", it's not a costume so it doesn't merit candy.
2. Appropriate sacking. Don't wear your backpack backwards and call that your bag. Five guys did that last night and not only does it look tacky, it covers up any semblance of a costume one might be wearing.
3. You must be able to say "trick-or-treat". If you are too young to get those words out, you are too young to be trick-or-treating and probably too young for candy. This carries over into #4 which is...
4. If you are in a stroller (or have to be carried to the stoop), you should not be out getting candy. Who are these parents fooling? This kid is not participating in a jovial toddler favorite, merely acting as a medium for their parents to get free candy. It's ridiculous and must stop.
5. "Thank you". Say it. Mean it. Once a year you get to dress up and go door to door to neighbors you may have never met. Let's try to make a good first impression shall we?
6. Your parents must not be following you in a car. How lazy are we? It was a beautiful 72 degrees last night. It's no wonder 60% of Americans are considered obese. Seriously folks, get out of your car and enjoy the walk.

Now, lest it sound as if Halloween was not entertaining, here are a few highlights:

1. Keyne the escape artist. Josh did a good job of penning her into the kitchen while Lindsay worked in the t.v. room, but every now and then Keyne would escape with her meaty bone and come inspect what I was doing and look out the screen door. This was very entertaining to see Josh react and see Keyne try to bark at people with a cow shoulder in her mouth.
2. Politeness. For the most part, with few exceptions, kids were a lot more polite this year. There was an especially polite she-devil that complimented the jack-o-lanterns (Lindsay didn't have the guts to tell her she and Grace had used stencils...)
3. Optimus Prime. It's a rare day when you are visited by a Transformer, especially the leader of the Autobots. This costume was tops. It was one of those pajama suits that's all one piece with a helmet that had to be three times the size of the kid's head. BUT, the best part was the voice modulator that would make what he said sound like Optimus Prime. Genius! He got a lot of candy.
4. Cell-phone. One girl had the audacity to continue texting her friend on her cell phone as Lindsay doled out the sweet goodness. She was lucky she didn't get smacked in the face, but it was entertaining to see what we've come to as a society.
5. BANG!!! It's never happened before, and it hopefully won't happen again. It definitely violates requirement #3 and almost violates requirement #4. As Lindsay worked in the t.v. room on her craft, and Josh took up the kitchen island with his, they suddenly hear a very loud BANG! Lindsay screams, thinking someone has just thrown her precious jack-o-lantern into the door. Josh yells from the kitchen, "What was that?!?" Lindsay peers around the corner to see a two-year old on the stoop rubbing his head and two parents laughing and helping him up - apparently he had tried to enter the house and didn't realize there was a glass door in his way. Lindsay opens the door to inspect the damage to the child, who was unphased and once the door was open proceeded to try and enter the house. The parents then proceeded to say trick-or-treat on behalf of the child and left. It violates some requirements, but man was it funny.

Lindsay and Josh hope your Halloweens were just as funny!